There WE Said It.com

Carragher and Neville Are Failed Left Backs?
I Know lets Pick Them Against Israel!
What A Good Idea, After All Experience Worked Against Croatia?

Home Football Blogs Other Sports Links Archive

17th March 2007

Your Mother Would Not Like Them, Nor Would Your Dad

I stuck with premiership players as although it made it easier to pick I could not stop remembering old time bad boys and wanted this to be relevant to anyone under 25. Also included is not just overt bad behaviour but being a lousy team mate by consistent injury and frankly the more we know about injury the less bad luck it seems. Manager is of course Dennis Wise with his old mucker Terry Spiv as coach.

The Team

Lehmann

Neill, A Ferdinand, Woodgate, Thatcher

Savage, Bowyer, Barton

Diouf, Kewell

Bellamy

  1. Jen Lehmann

    More of a comic villain in the Didier Drogba mode. Indeed their clash was one of the most pathetic comic moments of the season. He allegedly once hit a big red comedy nose with a pizza and in light of the rest of the division's cats being rather moribund he gets in. He's no Toni Schumacher mind.

  2. Lucas Neill

    A real turd who like many Australians has a speciality in gurning rants at referees. Perpetrator of horrible legbreaker tackles - literally once in Carragher's case. Claims he chose West Ham over Liverpool not for the money but for the love that Liverpool, who had clearly chased him all season, did not show him. Returned West Ham's love by instantly being injured, no doubt tripping over a wad of notes. Further put BS detectors close to over load by saying West Ham was not a cliquely squad.....

  3. Ben Thatcher

    Apparently "gentle" Ben is a really nice guy OFF THE FIELD. Horrific assaults on a number of players over the years culminating in his cheap shot on Pedro Mendes that had many fearing for the Portsmouth player's life. His ban was not nearly long enough and he should not play again if you ask me.

  4. Lee Bowyer

    Rather than list his sins and accepting a court verdict he had nothing to do with a racial assault in Leeds this man has one one redeeming feature. Yes, through the court case, fighting a team mate on the field, dope ban, Macdonald's smashing up, allegations of racist behaviour, stamping on a guys head etc etc he has never once been the kind of cunt who has to explain themselves to the media. An almost complete cunt in other words.

  5. Anton Ferdinand

    Who does he think he is? Rushing off to the US to get langered when told not to. Lying about it. Performing on the field like he does not have to try. Thinks he is bigger than the club and seemingly even his brother. Another on the Carlton Cole/Reo Coker road to nowhere. Honestly one good season and some of these kids think they have made it.

  6. Jonny Woodgate

    Centre halves are a bit thin on the ground and of course the Woodgate we have before us now is not the one who seemed destroyed by the court case over a racial assault in Leeds. We accept the court verdict that Woody was merely involved in some affray that night but the fact one of his mates got 6 years and would not have been there but for Woodgate does not adequately excuse him. Also rumoured to do things that attract the headlines with "Shame" in them off the field. What cements his place even with his new likeable personality and surprising adoption of the Spanish language is that he has not been fit for 3 or 4 years for his club and team mates.

  7. El Hadji Diouf

    The spitting cunt. Been arrested on suspision of suspected domestic violence to boot. More comic than nasty on the field although one of those whose balance can desert them at vital times in the opposition box. Seems to have no redeeming feature and a scar on African football. Indeed when it went off at the African Nations last year guess who was at the centre of a 2 team ruckus. Wasted Liverpool's money and only Big Sam has got a tune out of him. This year he even seems to no longer be producing for Bolton.

  8. Robbie Savage

    Once a pantomime villain he confirmed the low regard many have for him as he turned a Gilberto air shot into a sending off with some first rate acting. Left Birmingham claiming he wanted to be closer to his sick ma and da at a club not much, if at all, closer to Wrexham. Went down badly injured the other week and no misty eyes were seen for him.

  9. Craig Bellamy

    Another hated Welshman. The Risse thing got me. OK your mate is a teetotaller killjoy who won't do Karaoke. Do you a) slap him and call him a cunt b) do nothing c) call him a cunt, go home to bed, think about it, get a golf club and attack him in his room. A complete irritant missed by no one at clubs he leaves by some accounts. Another who skirts the law with court cases with accusuations of slapping women. An all round gent of the first order.

  10. Joey Barton

    Ah Joey. I want to like him. I want to like someone who appeared to take responisibility and put his background behind him but: an arrest last week for doing a Wisey (taxi driver assault): cream on top play behind forwards role he has adopted: cigars in the eye of team mates: beating up 15 year olds. I suspect he will leave this side but for now much as I preferred a 3rd Aussie in Cahill he just does not have the form of Siddy's Joey.

  11. Harry Kewell

    Not a bad man just a complete blank piece of paper. He almost comically sued Gary Lineker for suggesting his leaving Leeds was what was wrong with football. He is always injured now and a fitful contributor these days. Now down with the port drinkers disease Gout and can never be taken seriously again.

  12. Subs

    Tim Cahill who is the worst referee baiter in the division, for me. Added to his many acts of cuntery was his and Phil Neville slapping Gallas trying to get him wound up and sent off because Arteta stamped on him. Australian footballers may seem over represented here but it would have been worse if Kevin Muscat was still about (Hartson and Welsh men ditto).

    Richard Dunne tried and failed to do his Roy Keane with some gallery playing to the Man City fans (ala Barton). Frankly instead of shouting down others he should get the team together and not worry about how popular he is with the fans. You are the captain and a leader not a popularity contest.

    Arjen Robben and Mickey Owen, with their questionable fitness regimes and playing for themselves deserve their places. Owen Robben constantly publicly suggest that manager's make the team all about them. They constantly show they are better as subs but insist on starting even though they get injured way too frequently. Owen has cost Newcastle what 25 million plus in fees, kick backs and wages and for what? Robben berates a manager whose faith in him in my opinion was decisive in 2 Champions League exits.

    Emre 3 accusuations of racism in three weeks.... With Alpay and to a much lesser extent Tuguy have not exactly made the Turkish invasion popular.

    C'Ashley Cole never can a media profile have fallen further than when C'Ash had the gall to tell us his deep sense of injustice at being offered £55 grand a week instead of £60,000 he had expected (rumoured the difference was his agents demand and not Arsenal reneging). He will have "55 grand a week.... He is taking the piss" engraved on his tombstone (or should at least!). He sold his own wedding, nough said. He wife was accused of racist assault... He saw being accused of being homosexual as not just an incorrect label but a libel. Nice guy.

Home Football Blogs Other Sports Links Archive