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Jon's Blog Jan 2008

Thu 31st Jan
Time For Hicks And Gillette To Start Looking

It is surely time for Hicks and Gillette to start looking for a new manager or a buyer. Rafa has created a pile of poo.

Maybe they get lucky in the Champions League but that would not be the best indicator of where this team is going. Plus this year Gerrard started the season hard and they will not have the benefit of him fresh - or opponents who settle for 3 goals leads.

Symbolically at the 10th attempt a referee finally gave a penalty against Carragher. Quite how long he can disguise the weakness at the back is anyone's guess.

Thu 31st Jan
Harbhajan Possibly Not a Racist

The judge said "There remains a possibility of a misunderstanding in this heated situation.". For those like me deficient in English that means he probably is?

Quite why a judge is using beyond reasonable doubt surely throws open to question that this was not a stitch up to allow the BCCI to save face. The fact the judge had to specifically rule that out speaks volumes - like saying I don't beat me wife when no one suggested you do.

So Harbhajan is possibly not a vile racist - that is the ICC official verdict for you.

Wed 30th Jan
Newcastle Sense and No Sense : Can They Co-Exist?

I applaud Newcastle finally for trying ala Spurs to develop recruitment set aside from coaching. Given their manager is not a viewer of football this also makes a great deal of sense.

However (saw that coming?) they are essentially bringing in a 6 million a year coach famous for taking his ball home with him and giving him someone else's players.

Also what ethos will Wise use for recruitment? I ask because if you just hoover up who is available without criteria then it really does not matter who you buy eventually you end up with pieces that do not fit.

Arsenal clearly buy good technical players and great physical specimens and then actively mould them. Spurs, Chelsea, Liverpool and Newcastle just keep buying players dependent on the last game/series of games they played.

Unless you have a bottomless wallet or can improve seemingly mature players I don't see this altering the power in English football. The only way to compete is surely to buy players with upside who fit a way of playing you determine.

Wed 30th Jan
Woodgate : Spurs Buy For Need

Spurs need a centre half as Ledley King becomes the man who is never there and Dawson continues to clown it up. Indeed in the cup they were reduced to playing the reduced (in size) Huddlestone as his partner.

Unlike the Anelka buy, which I still think was wrong but allows them to sell Lampard and move 442 and money does not matter there, to me this does not make a great deal of sense over anything other than a perspective of next week/month. Woodgate is 28 and injury prone but will no doubt get wages associated with an England player.

Spurs seem as with adding a right back at £8 million (Hutton - Chelseaesque spending) to be buying who is available. I'd also argue that defence is about tactics, midfield cover, organisation and you can spend a lot on individuals without improving your defence.

Hutton at least at 23 is the right age but frankly if you cannot develop a right back for nothing fire your youth system leader.

The real concern beneath this is with the bloated youth schemes at Chelsea, Liverpool et al is this. Where are the players they are producing? Even position players who can play a defensive/midfield role seem in short supply. Yes developing a Ronaldo or a Rooney is hard or just luck - arguably Rooney is not developing to be a top player either. However for teams like Spurs to want to throw 27 million at Hutton, Woodgate and Downing is mind numbing.

There is clearly a lot of money in the game except at Anfield....

Wed 30th Jan
Harbhajan Merely A Vile Rat

As expected the ICC overturned the verdict on the vile Harbhajan Singh. As with the position over the PCB and Inzamam they end up with a verdict that makes no sense.

In the end are we demanding criminal levels of proof and beyond in sports. The Australians reacted instantly and I see no reason to overturn the original verdict.

Seriously does anyone think Ponting, Symonds, Hayden and co are capable of Machiavellian deceit? To act instantly on the field with the danger of stump microphones and the umpire contradicting them? The position as it now stands makes no sense.

This is a racist's charter to get round mealy mouthed weakly upheld rules. Again no one senior from the Indian side has defended the person here merely a suggestion he did not say what was alleged.

Indeed the finding he is a vile scumbag hardly vindicates the toy throwing from India without waiting for the usual ICC stitch up.

Sun 27th Jan
Gilchrist One Of The Greats

Adam Gilchrist whose near 50 average as a wicket keeper was for so long a huge advantage over any other team. Basically Gillie's average, unfortunately we can only use the crude unadjusted metrics available, meant that typically he was worth 50 runs a match over his opponent. Indeed those who tend to come closer in average maybe like Matt Prior tend to be a bit iron gloved behind the stumps.

I know the other day Gilchrist dropped a bad un and although probably worth his place at 36 better to go before people think you should. Indeed like Warney he is going out likely near the top.

With Glenn McGrath and Warney he is part of a trio that was key in Australia setting new standards in world cricket. Like Warne he may also have done much to change the image and role of the position he plays.

It does seem that Australia will go on as teams fail to match their hunger and competitiveness in match after match. India show they can compete now and have untold bowling coming through. However they don't play as often as say England and these petulant toy throwing episodes have to stop.

A real shame is that this series was not level going to the last test. The 2nd test India blew having been on the wrong end of a lot of decisions looks like a lost chance to see a decider as tense as the Oval in 2005 (the great thing with the Ashes is that despite England having a 2-1 lead the difference between losing and drawing that match was literally winning or losing the Ashes).

Of course the deeper sadness is that the vile Harbhajan Singh is on the field here. His appeal has been put back and one fears the hand of Ranjan Madugalle being used to excuse the conduct of Harbhajan Singh. His appeal should have been upheld or over turned by now if the BCCI/ICC had acted in the best interests of the game.

Sat 26th Jan
Tennis Changing Of The Guard?

They say in cricket that you don't know how well you batted till the other lot have had a knock. Well just over a week ago Andy Murray must have looked like another British choker. Now losing to Tsonga does not look half bad!

Of more interest to the wider tennis world would have been Tsonga's total eclipse of Nadal. One wonders if Nadal as he gets older can retain his remarkable conditioning and energy levels. He seems to have so many body parts taped. Of course Nadal has never really threatened on the bouncy artificial surfaces as he has done in Paris and to a lesser extent Wimbledon.

I know I fancied Novak Djokovic to eclipse Federer in New York but he admitted to getting tight and losing. Indeed although in the bizarre sense these things do Federer got a lot of praise for beating Nadal in 5 at Wimbledon I did wonder then how he could lose 2 sets on that surface to Nadal.

I guess we will know there has been a changing of the guard when those two are eclipsed in Paris and at Wimbledon. However the first real test to whether Federer has slipped relatively will come at Flushing Meadow.

So if Fed is beaten at Wimbledon we can become critics to prove wrong! If it is at Flushing it is relative decline. When he comes back and wins them all next year we are just wrong (that should be I but shared stupidity is so much better than being alone).

Fri 25th Jan
Liverpool Supporters : Just Do It

Apparently Liverpool supporters are threatening a financial boycott of the club. Well good on them. I hope this is over the decision by its owners to lump it with debt. Not from some mis-guided backing for the prima donna Benitez.

Last year Newcastle fans threatened similar only to expose their lack of self esteem and back down because a few results went their way. Thereby making their protests seem a child like immediacy obsession.

Here is the point better for the club to go into administration and Hicks and Gillette sell out cheaply than continue a farce. Not that that would ever happen as they'd be sold long before then. Although administration allows the club to be bought cheap and leaves more money for players and stadiums.

One hopes that this is not some annoyance at efforts to remove Benitez. Benitez surely all but asked to be sacked with his petulance in December when finding out they were not going to give him just another 25 million to spend?

Indeed surely the first job of any new owner is to institute a plan for Liverpool to develop talent and compete with the likes of Arsenal. The first step in that would obviously be to get a coach who can improve players and develop a team ethos rather than come up with a new one every week.

So thumbs up Liverpool fans if you do it. Just don't do it for silly reasons that have anything to do with Rafael Benitez's continued tenure. That would be infantile. The new owners have been more honest in a way than the ways that Benitez and Gerrard have held the club to ransom in recent years. So do it to protect your rising ticket prices from merely paying more and more to a bank in a credit crunch.

Thu 24th Jan
OK If Moyes Critics Are Mis-Guided Wenger's Are?

I have to take issue with after timing hindsight reporters over the team Arsenal played in the Carling Cup. If a journalist or pundit heavily criticised Arsene Wenger last year for not playing his best side in the Carling semi and final then a continuation criticism this year is good honest principled debate. If it is a reaction to last night's stuffing then it is poor.

The point is that what these clowns refuse to understand is that when Avram Grant puts out his best available team he is managing to no plan beyond the next game. Last year Mourinho in an effort to shore up his ego against an owner who no longer cared for him adopted a similar attack with a smaller squad and came up short. Indeed injuries this year to Lampard, Ricardo Carvalho and the Drog being the legacy of that foolery (I called it at the time before anyone gets the hypocrite flags out).

Arsenal clearly uses the cups to bed in players and they get the chance to develop without the pressure of being in a tournament the team is desperate to win. This is a clear plan. Should Wenger change his entire approach because he faces Spurs in a semi final? That is the kind of short termism that means Chelsea and others are not developing players. It would make no sense.

Does it weaken Wenger's legacy that Arsenal has not won a trophy in 3 years? Of course not. Not even to critics of yesterday's selection.

Indeed this year he has more excuse to not play his first teamers with the African Cup of Nations he cannot take too many chances he loses them. Arsenal is not that strong in depth yet. They are getting there but for hard league battles to come and with the Champions League a final at Wembley on boggy ground is not something they need.

Did winning the cups save Mourinho last year? No. Where are Chelsea heading other than to another orgy of money or going backwards a year or so from now? 15 million for 6 week stop gaps! Arsenal? Experienced Young players! Cash Cow stadium! Ethos, Plan. That will do for me.

When Spurs last won a semi final 5-1, 2002 against Chelsea, they were stuffed 4-1 twice by Chelsea shortly after and lost the final... So let's see how it all plays before giving it too much meaning even for Spurs.

Thu 24th Jan
Moyes Critique Unfounded

It seems the Sun view of David Moyes 451 against Chelsea is that it was way too defensive in a semi final at home. Well I beg to differ....

Everton's best shot was from set pieces and they did pretty well forcing 4 or 5 saves, some excellent, from the massive Cech.

Everton tried to open up against Arsenal the other week and despite dominating the game lost 4-1. They just do not have the one on one defensive ability to face a team like Chelsea in open play 442. Joleon Lescott a defender with huge strengths of which open field defending is not one.

At Stamford Bridge they struggled against 10 Chelsea players fancy facing 11 all out? Grant would have tossed himself off if Everton had tried to attack Chelsea in open play when he had SWP, Malouda, Joe Cole and Anelka all brilliant in open field on the break.

Indeed the one time you could favour Anelka over the Big Drog, MAYBE, is when you are one up (as Chelsea were) and the opposition over commit forward. Chelsea were set up to counter attack and that is as plain as the nose on anyone's face - excepting people who have gone too far with plastic surgery. This is how they scored in the end as Joe Cole got free in a counter attack.

Case closed, NEXT! (arrogant moi?)

Thu 24th Jan
Chelsea : The Entertainers

Grant adopted what I saw as a 4231 but one can argue that. The front 4 with Anelka, Joey, SWP and Malouda is quite exciting top be honest.

The only real weakness forward being Anelka who if he were anyone else I would be giving the benefit of the doubt over his fee - he's had so many fees and chances no more latitude from me. Using the Johann Cruyff everyone is a good player with 5 meters (or words to that effect). I called Rooney a 2 meter player. Well Anelka needed a ton of time on the ball and clearly shies away from any physical contact and is a 3 meter player - not exactly what you need against a team that is ahead and not that useful when holding a lead against committed opponents.

Everton forced many saves from the new daddy Cech who seemed to be intent on creating a video highlight to bore his offspring with in future years. Most of their good work was at set pieces. I noted yesterday how Chelsea could have been set piece monsters well they are the opposite now.

The front 4 provide no markers at corners and anyone who says that Anelka is a half of having the Big Drog is making a big mistake. Drogba is useful in defense and whilst he can be comical at times he does not shy away from physical contact - even if people half his size walk away with him seemingly broken sometimes, he's funnier than Anelka as well.

Added to it Belletti/Ferreira and Bridge/C'Ash hardly add effective height and with Makelele also vertically challenged this Chelsea team has lost the key strength of the early Mourinho. They were as good as anyone and better organised and they were murder at set pieces.

This formation with 4 layers should be perfect for John Terry and his presence and maybe given the rest, dare I say, Ballack's to help sort out the set pieces. My only caveat is that Terry has not been his best for a while but maybe these other injuries will allow his neck, back, toe, muscles etc to heal properly. Certainly we can expect Capello will play some kind of back 4 with 1 or 2 in front and at his best Terry is the man for that.

On a really positive note Chelsea Spurs final may actually be worth watching as a neutral for the football. Neither team has a dominator at the back. Edge to Chelsea if Lampard, Essien and The Drog line up - indeed the real edge is of course a restored Cech.

Memo to keepers Joe Cole goes near post cover it.

Wed 23rd Jan
Silence Right For Munich Dead

Man City's craven call for a minute of applause to mark the 50th anniversary of the Munich Air Crash is contemptible. I guess they are worried/know their fans will show themselves up as low life scum.

This is not the Old Firm where the teams are divided by history more than just sharing the same city. This is just bitter little people like those that Siddy nut Ricky Hatton took to Vegas to boo the US National Anthem before his laughable attempt to beat Floyd Mayweather.

Personally I am tired of the modern mawkish obsession with finding things to have a silence for before football matches and agree with Steve Davies of the Racing Post about building black stripes into the arm of the jersey! Honestly I never have any idea what most of these are about as I don't switch the sound on till late nowadays.

However this is clearly a correct occasion for Man United to choose to honour those that were lost. Those Man City fans that choose to show themselves up well maybe they would be just confirming what we already suspect about them.

Wed 23rd Jan
Keegan : Who Do You Buy?

Keegan apparently has 30 million burning a hole in Mike Ashley's pocket and no doubt Ashley is eager to show off. Indeed King Kev would probably like to get his feet under the table and wait more than the owner. Who can Kevin have scouted out in his 3 years of not watching a game?

Yet who can you buy now? Do you pay all your money for a Micah Richards who is neither going to cement your defense nor revolutionise your play? Who will cost so much and be paid so much there is little or no upside. Man City have money to spend and are not, why? The reason is that everyone has money and where can you spend it? Even the African Cup of Nations sounds like a premiership game! Oh that Kolo Toure looks a decent player! doh!

My view for Newcastle (and Liverpool, Spurs whoever) is to aim to be competitive 2 or 3 years in 5 or 7. To look for players with upside even those whose careers stalled through no fault of their own.

Not spending real money for bitty filler players who Man United no longer need. Indeed look at Man U the strength of their side is not the full price Rooney and Ferdinand or even, the now looking cheap but then expensive youth prospect, Ronaldo but that they have paid nothing or very little for Evra and Vidic and have squad cover from the likes of O'Shea and Brown who cost nothing (bizarre that others pay so much for what United don't). Liverpool despite greater need have not introduced a youngster since Owen it seems (plus Owen and Fowler brought in a lot of revenue to go).

Indeed any plan must go beyond the manager buying and selling players. Newcastle needs to look to develop at least say 10 out of a squad of 24. Even if they are the worst 10 say: a Cudicini back up goal keeper (160K for Chelsea a week of someone's wages now): O'Sheas and Browns who cover multiple positions: Full backs Arsenal spun the limited injury prone Ashley Cole for 5 million and Gallas who is coming on stream now and covers all back positions and is a threat at the other end (BTW things Chelsea missed on apparently Jose Mourinho wanted Richards and to keep Gallas can you imagine a corner against The Drog, Ballack, Ricardo Carvalho, Terry, Gallas and Micah!!!! now they have Alex and Ben Haim with Boulahfool gone - reverse alchemy!) - Gary Neville.

By develop I do not mean only take youth products but get someone under rated. Maybe a Carlton Cole who can lead the line and is the kind of player like Andrew Cole was who would thrive under Kevin's arm round the back. Not that West Ham will be selling easily.

The point being that even to stabilise in mid table Newcastle will spend a lot of money. To compete will need Rafa/Chelsea like injections of 30 million every window. That is just unsustainable always assuming a) players want to go there b) other clubs are not in there before you c) you can mould a team in a state of permanent change d) the money does not run out.

For me only Arsenal and Man United look to build and have a career path for their kids. Chelsea can barely put any in their Carling squad. This mirrors baseball where my Blue Jays are trying to compete with money against the Yankees and Red Sox who are also better at developing talent. Bizarre.

Wed 23rd Jan
Benitez : The Key Case Against

My main argument against Benitez is this is any player he has bought worth more relative to the market than when he bought them? Peter Crouch arguably but arguably that comes from his England work - certainly not from Benitez evidently preferring the near useless Kuyt over him - Kuyt is shite. Even then in the current market is Crouch worth more relatively than paid?

Arguably when near 29 year olds with a 1 in 3 record and a history of sulking are going for 15 million Benitez has shown the kind of reverse alchemy with his buys that even Chelsea might be impressed with.

My point being that regardless of how good a manager he is in the current credit crunch and not having genuinely cash rich owners Liverpool will have to pay a lot buying fully formed players if they cannot improve what they buy. That is just not a strategy open to them. I can only imagine it is their remoteness and realisation of the cost of replacement that has meant they have indulged Benitez a whole month after he, and it was he, started the public spat like a spoilt child. Now of course the reality is Benitez is the one begging for his job whereas 3 years ago he held Liverpool to ransom.

Steven Gerrard who can always be trusted to back every story he read in the Sun came out against something horrible and nasty without specifying quite what but uncertainty does seem to be messing with his head. Quite what right Gerrard whose media goons ran all over Liverpool for 2 or 3 consecutive summers has to attack anyone is beyond me. I am gradually warming to his play as being more intelligent than when he was sent to the wings but his self indulgence off the pitch will always be off putting.

Mon 21st Jan
Farve Gives Up Again

I don't particularly follow the NFL but for a few years I did watch a lot of games. There always appeared to be a gap between the reality of what they said about Brett Favre and his actual ability. Well this year all that changed as he resurrected himself as a thrower and the Packers really bounced from a shocker last year.

One thing that has not changed since when I really watched games in 1999ish is that Green Bay's season generally ends on or shortly after Favre interceptions. Not slight over throws tipped ala Peyton Manning last week but awful could not care less throws. It is not like he chokes more like he quits - his body language backing this up.

Now I am not someone who thinks choking is necessarily a bad thing - you have to compete and get close to choke and being British I know what true clenching is - not even competing and always needing to be an underdog to try. However given with Favre every Packers game is a commentorially homage to his incredible physical toughness (wow how many games how many hits? how does he play every week?) and his personal qualities. It is the latter category I challenge given a) the way he seems in tight play off games to just lose it and quit b) his gurning dis-associative body language when other players make mistakes. In the end he boils it down to himself.

Maybe in his early years he was different but it is clear perception lags reality here. He is not Joe Montana or John Elway for instance. Indeed the wags could point out despite lots of chance he has the same number of rings as Trent Dilfer and Brad Johnson - yes I am a Bucs fan. He could have a few more but for quitting almost every year I have watched since his 97 triumph.

My only regret is not backing the Giants not for the Favre reason but this... I get the impression ESPN, where one is not allowed to mention the spread for some stupid reason, kept battering how Eli had never won in X degrees... Well the Bucs got all that every year until they won the NFC Championship at 'the Vet'. As one Buc said it was 45 then 44 then 43 etc it was just bull shit. There are stats that mean something (OBP in baseball) and ones that mean nothing (RBI in baseball) and some are merely observations such as the lowest temperature a 3rd year Quarterback has won in.

Sun 20th Jan
India : No Harbhajan No Problem

Well India must be really pissed they blew/the umps cost them the last test or it would be all to play for in the last test. Much like England 2.5 years ago the Australians are struggling against a team who gets enough runs and has bowlers who all take wickets. No one made a century for them either so most everyone chipped in somewhere with some runs.

Indeed it is Australia who have the 4th seamer doing a Mahmoud/Anderson and being barely bowled in Tait.

The point is that to beat Australia you have to bowl well. They bat deep and have in Ponting the world's 1st or 2nd best at present. They generally have very consistent bowlers and are always at you.

What is sad is that I would like to have seen India have a chance to win the series and then go after the world no 1 position. Beating Australia once does not make you the world no 1 but beating everyone and them does.

And you know whilst I was dismissive at the time maybe Warney was right when he claimed Australia were too arrogant. Either way the 4th test promises to be must see TV. Cricket has not been so good in a while let us hope no one ruins it. If the vile Harbhajan plays he sticks to the spirit of the game. Although why bring him back except to get Ponting out!

Sun 20th Jan
United Fans Attack The Wrong Person

The sad and cowardly attack on the home of Man United chief suit David Gill makes me wonder at the sanity, perspective and racist tendencies of the hard core Man United supporters - their intelligence is not in question after their laughably stupid behaviour in the Rock of Gibralter affair. After all Gill is not the one most responsible for United current plight of leading the league with a title in the bank. Nor is he most responsible for the Glazers gaining ownership.

Pop Quiz when the Glazers wanted to take over Man United whose voice against would have meant something and whose would not? Gill or Ferguson? Which one would you expect craven bureaucratic behaviour from and which to stand up like a man? Which one gets the blame from the fans? The one who did what his type do? Or the one who did not need the money and had alienated the main shareholders?

Put another way which one of these treated the fans like idiots? Which one dragged them into a court case with the major shareholders? Which one marched the fans up to the top of the hill and left them there when it was clear he had no case and was trying to milk 10s of millions from people who had kindly given him a share in a horse for nothing? That surely made the Glazers' job easier.

Who stood by who when the leading shareholders pointed out the widespread corruption in the club? When the BBC pointed out the unhealthy presence of certain relatives of their's? Whose behaviour led the leading shareholders to suggest the club was corrupt and led to part of their alienation? Who was Gill forced to defend all the time in the face of these allegations weakening the club's ability to defend against the Glazers?

I've always wondered at those United fans who excuse Ferguson everything including treating them like clowns over the Rock Of Gibralter affair (where he got several million given to him and wanted more). Do they support United or the manager? How can you blame Gill and not Ferguson? What is worse about the Glazers than the Coolmore guys, Gill and Kenyon who ruled the roost not so long ago that so angers United fans?

United fans have to start living in the real world that Gill did nothing wrong - who can blame him for retaining a high paying job. Nor can we blame Ferguson for staying on but given he had far more say than Gill and had shown he could march the fans up the hill over a crass lawsuit of his own surely he is far more guilty of whatever they think Gill is guilty of? Why will they not face the facts that if anyone helped the Glazers it was Ferguson and his disputes with the BBC and most damaging the Coolmore boys.

Of course you have to wonder at the cretinicity of the ironically named Manchester Education Committee when it targeted the Cheltenham festival where Magnier would have 1 or 2 runners... Newmarket would have been a far better target for 100s of reasons and more! After all Rock of Gibralter won the 2000 Guineas and was worth more than every National Hunt horse in training put together. Doh.

You can hardly accuse the Glazers of running the team into the ground or of avoiding the transfer market or of failing to create a title winner. Is it cos they are coughJ....ishcough????

Sun 20th Jan
Whimsy on Tyneside

Keegan has made that selfless leader of men and boys Michael Owen his captain. I guess there is no obvious leader in that squad and Mickey by default is the anthropologically speaking highest up the food chain.

However as I said the other day his whole career is about him. From when he was 11 the story goes, apocryphal we hope, that he played for one team and was clear top scorer but not named player of the year so he played for another team and scored 6 against them - yaa boo. Such pathetic me behaviour unfortunately does seem to be typical for someone who at his peak viewed scoring a goal as proving anyone wrong who pointed out he was not that great. Whose managers like Houllier were reduced to having to spend half the season supporting him like a savant child unable to deal with adult emotions.

Owen can still use his savvy to get goals for himself. However even at his best it was only in those phases where he only had to look at the goal to score that he was anywhere near world class - or worthy of a good team. The reason in his own mind he had to keep proving people wrong was the long droughts. Bear in mind he has never cracked the 20 league goals mark.

Newcastle made themselves a slave to the ageing Shearer and the ageing Owen without pace now and without Fat Al's size offers the team nothing but what he can poach. He can only play for himself now and surely is the opposite type of player than should be made captain.

Owen has improved some of his all round play. I know I throw less rubber objects when he plays for England. However my main memory of him will be with time and space with no shot on just making incredibly negative and poor passes to marked players, or dropping off 20 yards to send the ball to a centre half! or back where it came.

Sat 19th Jan
Graveney No Longer A Selector : 1 Cheer for the ECB

First the good news Craveney and his Flintstone bottom sucking is gone. Now the ummmhhh aahhhh news he is replaced by fellow selector Geoff Miller. Added to Miller are seemingly public school twit coach Peter Moores ( The King's School, Macclesfield) and 2 recent ex-players James Whitaker another seeming old school tie (judged on accent) and recently retired 'King of Spain' the admirable Ashley Giles (Gilo).

Much as I like Gilo the player who just got on with it I cannot help feel that he is too close to the current buffoonery. Maybe he stood aside but...

Moores is the coach and only other full time selector. He should have nothing more than the ability to write up his assessment of players and coaching, for me.

Whitaker never impresses me when he has been on commentary with his super smashing positivity and accent rather an irritant.

What annoys me is that there is no one of a statistical bent there. In baseball anyone who goes on about broad stats like average in cricket would be laughed at. I think we need to identify the best players not those who seem to have the self esteem their public school engendered in them. Too much poor evaluation happens in sports with metrics 'cos people look the part. In English cricket this seems the only criteria.

I hope we see an improvement without the obsession with well known individuals. I mean does it serve anyone's purpose other than Phil Space school of journalism to pick Flintoff for games he is not fit for? Let him and others get fit and show their form. Also stop thinking about what people could do and look at what they actually do - yes you Harm-less-son and only if the wicket is fast Panesar.

Fri 18th Jan
Reverse Alchemy Chelsea's Specialist Subject

Lassana Diarra went from a £2 million pound poor reserve Chelsea happily off loaded to Arsenal to 3 months later an alleged £5.5 million pound 60 grand a week over inflated ego at Portsmouth this week.

It all goes to show that Chelsea don't value money or that some transfers have so many pay offs in them that only the club and his owner lose out.

Quite what in his few appearences for Arsenal and his mostly poor performances for Chelsea has prompted Harry to want to pay 5.5 million of his owners money and 10 million in wages over 3.5 years for the 22 year old is of course beyond me and common or even uncommon sense. Harry also chimed he was already one of the best midfielders in the Premiership.

It does seem the way to get bought as a midfielder is to open your mouth. Joey Barton sounded off at team mates before knocking one unconscious. The South American who flattened the head tennis guy was being considered. Makes you long for Essien, Hargreaves, Makelele, Fabregas, Flamini and Carrick who just get on with the job without flattening someone every week and sounding off. Wonder why they succeed?

Prices are rising I guess. Delusion has always been there.

Fri 18th Jan
Havant : Break A Leg

Wow if I am one of the few fans in England not excited by the return of Keegan I am even stonier on Havant's progress in the FA Cup. I hope Benitez, who seems quite happy to be unpopular, makes it clear publicly to the referee beforehand what a bunch of leg breaking thugs they are. It will be interesting if he risks Gerrard or Torres in this game.

Having said that not showing Havant v Swansea also showed the BBC up. Sure Man City West Ham might ensure a better viewership but if you market on the magic of the cup and are a public service broadcaster why cover a match between 2 teams who'd quite happily not have the game and would have settled it over penalties at Hackney Marshes if they had their way (rather than 2 games of football - see also Reading Spurs).

Only insomniacs could claim last night's game as a public service.

Fri 18th Jan
Keegan A Boost Then What?

Keegan has done well initially with all his clubs Newcastle, Fulham, England (I recall saying I wouldn't pick Paul Scholes which I repeated after each of his 3 goals - my man commented that the woman in the kitchen thought I was an idiot who knew nothing) and Man City. After the initial euphoria and money spending it dies as personal qualities are not enough.

I feel kind of hard hearted about this. I've never really loved Keegan or even liked that amateur way. He seems to have enormous personal qualities but I am sure that the modern era with training, diet, fitness and tactics will be harder for him. Also he inherits a squad of complete dreck with the divisive Mike Owen in it.

Who can forget Mickey O's finest hour, the one where I developed a deep loathing for the forward. Keegan somehow decided that England would be better 451 with Andrew Cole up front. We played France in a friendly that way and Mickey came off the bench and got the equaliser late. Great result. Nope he celebrated by running to the bench staring the manager out. A neat summation of his career really that showed that a) he was, as Madrid found, more effective off the bench (and stayed fitter) b) England had got a great result against a team who were World and European Champions yet as Mickey was not the centre of it he objected c) France played friendlies hard so this was the high point of Keegan's England and his downfall as it turned out.

Anyway Keegan broke in the face of the PR onslaught that only Owen could generate at the time (wittingly or unwittingly) and 3 days before the Germany game said I've always played 2 strikers. So 442 and David Beckham played Germany alone with Southgate a bizarre'un in midfield. Owen rewarded his manager with an all time shocker. Wembley closed to a scene of misery and Keggsie walked out.

So forgive me if the only thing that makes me smile about Keggsie coming back is the chance to see him and Owen co-exist. No doubt bullied by expectation Keegan will play 442 and pick Mickey when fit which given he has the summer off he may decide to play a few games for the 'castle this year - to impress Fabio. If they can get Shearer in they would only be Lineker short of the 4 biggest egos in English football over the last 30 years - ever wondered why teams not dominated by their strikers do better than us?

Thu 17th Jan
Keegan Back!

Simply bewildering.

Thu 17th Jan
ICC Carve Up

The ICC should offer their services at Christmas for Turkey carving. They are so good at carving up real issues into a series non issues and letting it go. All at the medium/long term expense of the sport but hell they don't think that far ahead.

Harbhajan's appeal against a 3 match ban for allegedly calling Symonds a 'Big Monkey' will now take place after the test series. Allowing India to do nothing to live up to their threats if it is upheld.

Much as the punishment of the serial breaker of the laws and spirit of the game Inzamam ul Haq was allowed to happen after the 1 day series with England. thereby allowing the PCB to not lose any face. Indeed the child like PCB are so emboldened at the craven ICC they have now asked that the test be declared something other than forfeit. Ranjun Madugalle even would have trouble producing that outcome within the rules but the ICC would no doubt argue the rules don't mean a damn thing to them.

I wonder what Harbhajan's comment translated nicely I am told as "Your Mother's Snatch" will be worth? Less? More? Or because it was in a 3rd party language nothing? Will they decide that Harbhajan swearing in a 2nd language (to him) with words that sound amazingly like the ones the Indians, and some say he in particular, were clearly told were unacceptable a few months before be enough to let him off?

As noted before not one person seems to have defended Harbhajan with testimonials to his personal qualities or to have suggested he is not the type of person to say what is alleged. That is what I find most shocking and unexpected of all. Howard Cosell the great American broadcaster was excused calling someone a little monkey (not in insulting face screwing terms either more in the you little monkey way) because of his long history of anti racism and prominent friendship with 'The Greatest' Muhammad Ali.

Yet who has stood by Harbhajan? His captain eventually with a he did not say it - no 'he could not have said that'. Ditto Sachin Tendulkar at the hearing. Even fans of India have tried well if he did say it it was a homage not insult (an idea which even the writers must know was garbage) or that he was justified as a few decisions went the wrong way and Symonds did what every Indian batsman would do and stood his ground.

Racist or not Harbhajan Singh does seem to be vile and not many people of substance openly disagree with that - or not enough to speak openly.

Thu 17th Jan
Newcastle's Conceit

Wow where did this entertainment schtick come from? It is like a ready made excuse for failure - oh we play good football. The oddity is I would say that mostly Newcastle is more famous and identifiable for trying to score through the front players than anything exciting. Sure it was lovely in the 90s and Keggsie, Waddle and Beardsley had a brief period tossing themselves off but in between times it has been pretty grim.

Growing up Sarf I do recall the Southern 'castle Spurs who supposedly claim they like their football a certain way. They played long up to Gilzean and Chivers and had a squad of leg breakers - see Kinnear and his football style in the 70s. That team was replaced by the brutal team of Keith Burkenshaw who after they had brutalised Bobby Robson's Ipswich (who did actually play good football) said it was 'a man's game' - twit.

I'd go further was any team built around the brutal physical power of Shearer and Ferdinand actually that great to watch? Shearer's appeal was always his brute strength, intelligence and power meant he equalised for the talent of others. Watching him back in and bully was effective but hardly the fields of green in footballing lore? Did the Geordies desert the club when this was happening? No.

It is hard enough in the middle reaches to be a good team without imposing say 442 2 wide 2 up on a manager. Not sure what Blackburn play but Hughes Blackburn have 2 wide (Ped and Bent) and sometimes 2 up and scored a whole goal more than Sam's Newci (3 now but Sam avoided the Man U caning).

Even Barcelona is trying to scale back the excesses of luxury players. It is a conceit unless you plan to spend hundreds of millions to talk like this. I know I felt that in many ways the Madrid Galacticos were better to watch than Chelsea a few years ago but of course never won anything. However Newcastle is so far removed from being able to afford 3 or 4 luxury players to play to finish CL and accept they will not win the league. Not sure Madrid want to go back either. They don't even have the 6 artisans and top class Cat to half pull it off anyway.

At present Newcastle don't have a choice. I really don't see where they go from here, except the championship, if they want to be the entertainers. Any good creative players on top of a team that defends like Newcastle and has poor footballing players like Butt, Smith and a host of non-entities is going to be a dog's breakfast.

It's is like trying to sprint before you can walk to demand attacking football. Stay up this year and next and build from the ground up. Play the kind of football the resources you have determine. Do they have any players anyone would covet? Are the managers they are being lined up with any more entertaining that Sam Allardyce? Was it really worth sacking an in situ manager for this mess?

You see so many people run out one liners to explain everything and make decisions on the basis of them. Yet to try to run a football club with a series of one liners (attacking football!) is just moronic. If this is a real demand from real Newcastle fans then they are like children who expect their in debt parents to fund the same christmas as Johnny Rich-Kid.

Wed 16th Jan
Mark Hughes Big Sam

A quick check of the record shows that in 21 games when Allardyce got the hook his Newcastle who were struggling had one less goal than Blackburn (anyone who read me on the grauniad blog will know I incorrectly called Blackburn a 433 team despite often playing with 2 forwards). Bolton got more goals than Portsmouth last year. 442 does not goals make. Quite what Newcastle mean by attacking football is beyond me. I know some loved Roy Evan's Funboy football teams over Houllier's but in the end trophies count more even on Tyneside.

Wed 16th Jan
Branislav Ivanovic : Chelsea Find Use For 9 Million More

OK I am no expert on world football and so can only comment generally on the fact Chelsea have spent 9 million on a Serbian Defender from Lokomotiv Moscow.

2 things occur: at 23 he is about as old as you want to be adding to your squad for more than just wages: he is described as a defender who play across the back. Now this is useful but similar types like Silvestre, Boulahrouz, Melchiot and Wes Brown make me wonder at how good he actually is. Most turn out to be little above replacement value full backs - Boulahrouz may be the worst player not called Sheva in the VFM stakes.

Also the fact the money is going to Russia inevitably makes one pretend to be sage and wise although I have no clue if Mr Abramovich has any link to Lokomotiv Moscow. That last signing from Russia Maniche was a poor player rapidly moved along. His chief contribution was giving The Drog his first really big game, that media folk noticed or should have, as Maniche got sent off and Chelsea were 1 goal down to West Ham before Drogba ran all over them and it finished 4-1

Anyway as with Anelka this makes some sense and I don't know enough to knock the fee here. What in the end it has shown is that earnest premiership players like Sidwell and Ben Haim are not cheap alternatives and both are likely to be gone at season end.

Oh some good news for Chelsea Kenyon's club of 2nd rate spivs the G14 has been disbanded. So Chelsea won't have to bow and scrape to join it now. Is nothing beneath his dignity?

Wed 16th Jan
Rafa Brought It On Himself

The Liverpool fans are on the TV wailing at Rafa being emasculated by the owners. They are saying, as their tears fill up their glasses, that Hicksy should not have done wot he done in public. That they should stick by the cuddly loveable Rafa with his hilarious van Dyke.

Well I beg to differ. Which petulant joker ran to the press when he got his budget in December and kept saying "I am just the coach"? As Hicks would say who first pouted publicly? Indeed the fact he was not summarily dismissed shows that football is a funny game. You had better be good and win something more than cup comps every few years to pull that bullshit, IMHO.

I am sure as we see with Newcastle, where the list of potential managers is a list of the unproven, more or less of the same, that only the paucity of seeming alternates at this time of year keeps Rafa employed. Or maybe Lippi's English!

The good news is that once again Rafa can look at keeping his team fresh and hoping a Champions League falls his way as if they could sack him they would have done so by now.

This is a tournament which seems to come down between the freshest and best team whereas Liverpool will need to be a lot better over the next 5 months to wrest the league. Better to try to be good for 4 ties where they can play Gerrard's favourite role, underdog.

You see the mental weakness of Rafa and the folly of dealing with this man with any honesty tonight. Like Avram Grant he cannot see a game he should not try his best players in now such is his horizon. Gerrard and Torres to beat Luton in the miserable FA cup?

Tue 15th Jan
Downing 12 Million Wow

I have cribbed the Anelka buy on value grounds and what it says about the minimal horizon at Chelsea. However quite what Spurs need with another wide player with questionable crossing is what I am unclear about. OK the guy has a left foot - big deal.

Downing is probably a defensive upgrade on playing one of the lightweight boys Lennon and Malbranque but so would Shaun Wright Phillips.... Or indeed a card board mock up.

In some ways were Anelka's overall record more like this season then you could dismiss that deal only as short term tinkering but still addressing a need. With Downing I just don't know what paying a heavy price and 4 years of complementary (to the fee) contract achieves. Sure valuations are up and money is awash but is Downing really what any team needs? 4 goals 1 assist so far this season? Don't they have Bale as a sort of expensive left peg left sided guy?

Even if Downing could cross unless they start playing Bent I am not sure that a wide player who has no pace to beat someone and just hoiks it in is what they need. Spurs seem to have stock piled players at times only to let them go. They famously grabbed Murphy, Davids, Jenas, Reid and other midfielders yet where are they weak? (goalkeeper excepted).

Spurs have yet, in 3 or 4 years of buying, to replace their worst player the goal keeper. Indeed he has now been dropped but given a below average player would have been a better bet and might have got them Champions League football 2 years ago that would seem to have been a more pressing need than buying English players at premium prices in non central positions.

Tue 15th Jan
Keegan Shearer : Just Infantile

The poverty of my broadband connection and Nick Collins asinine analysis may have tipped me into anger.

Anyway, here goes, Keegan is a below average manager. His pomp was the 90s when Newcastle outspent everyone and before teams played 451 to kill teams who naively played 2 centre forwards and wingers as a rule. His time is passed as he admitted when leaving England so dramatically and honestly - and finishing with Man City.

There is no evidence that Alan Shearer has any ability to manage. Like most centre forwards he is smart but also as selfish as they come. It is like Hollywood the odds on someone being genuinely good looking and having the motivation to learn how to act? Pretty long.

The idea of taking 2 of the biggest heroes in a club's history and making them a management team is just infantile cretinicity. Frankly given the way Keggsie managed Shearer may as well take the job himself. Management in football needs a hierarchy of 1 - manager and everyone else. Look at Staunton's ill fated leadership of the Republic of Ireland with an experienced hand holder! Indeed Bobby Robson's enthusiasm based management and ability to come 2nd are pretty close to Keegan's strengths.

Also Keegan would just be another buy and sell players type manager. A step down from Allardyce as well in that he would build nothing and add nothing. Again do Newcastle fans think they can compete with better managers and bigger budgets just buying and selling players managed by a local hero?

Ashley said he wanted to be hands on etc etc yada yada yada but he is just lying to himself all he can control in the budget, who he hires and when he sacks them. Chairmen or owners who claim anymore or worse do anymore are fools or liars. He has sacked Allardyce to get what his 2nd choice? 3rd choice? Arguably Shearer and Keegan would not even be his choice but the kind of populism almost guaranteed to fail. One assumes Ashley did not get where he is today by listening to whimsy.

Mon 14th Jan
Ashley : Used To The Sound Of His Own Voice

Mike Ashley says he wants to run Newcastle his way. That kicking out fat Sam was his first step in taking control. Again we have someone successful in business pretending football is just another business. He wants to beat Chelsea and stuff Spurs. Does he want to pick the team? Is he aware that even Roman's boy dropped Sheva? You have no say as chairman other than to sack the manager.

I wonder if he could appoint a top manager who would be led by him? (After all it was hard to get anyone before they canned Sam and the owner talked about running the show) Roman Abramovich ended up with an obviously competent coach but surely not someone to take Chelsea on or even make rational long term decisions.

As usual we get the populist rubbish about having fun. About running it his way. Attacking football. Admired by others. Lead the Toon army. Yeah and I'd like beautiful rich women I could show off who don't care for their own pleasure and just want to devote their's and their friends' lives to mine.

At present he has a team that cannot defend and is not great in attack. That has lots of ageing players or players who struggle with fitness. Lots of fair weather players and some down right poor players.

One has to hope that someone at the News Of The World was just trying to make him seem an everyman by patronising the Newcastle fans that this is what they want. Without knowing that all I can say is that this article makes he, the writer and the editor who allowed this tosh to be published look like fools.

Even taken as a piece of ego driven nonsense do the Newcastle fans want to be slave to one man's whims? Is sacking your manager with no plan on replacement and just trying to grab the most available out there doing it his way? Is that the path to glory?

In many ways short/medium term Harry Redknapp would have been a great choice. 442 keep it simple and be nice to the players. He would buy and sell in the middle - albeit as Sam found when you can afford the domestic based players they are not as good as you think they are! Now that plan has fallen through I don't see where they go? Hughes is a good choice but like Redknapp if you want to take on the big boys you need more than big spending on the first team.

Even when they were spending money they could not get top flight unblemished foreigners to come. Even Chelsea cannot get the very top and they can offer London. No offense I'd happily choose the Tyne but to someone from outside the country no way. If he really had a plan it would be from the ground up. Yet all we get is Gordon Brown style wishful thinking and talk of throwing money around.

Is he going to outspend Thaksin? Abramovich? What about if Dubai buy Liverpool? Or the Glazers sell to someone with real dosh? Or when Arsenal gets fully on stream? In the end it feels like a pipe dream of a recipe to blow as much money as Roman Abramovich and frankly 1.6 Bn Sterling in paper valuation he is not in that league.

Sun 13th Jan
United : Well Set

If Andy Cole needed as many shots as Wayne Rooney to get a goal what would his reputation have been? What is the obvious difference between Andy Cole and Wayne Rooney? People love ugly scousers?

Indeed Rooney should just be told to hit the target that would be a start.... Actually as Rooney showed last season and in his amazing cup cameo against Villa as teams tire and the game opens up he becomes a good player. As Johann Cruyff said when the Dutch were bigging up the Saudi's who had beaten them everyone looks good given 5 meters. Thus Rooney is a 2 or 3 metre player not the 1 or none that we would love him to be. Nonetheless given Tevez finished last season hard United seem well set especially if they ever get anything from the more talented and suited front man Saha (don't hold your breath on that).

Ronaldo is rapidly making me over come my view of last year where he got lots of goals from lots and lots of shots. Like Rooney playing for a team that moves the ball so well and has 55% or more possession means raw goals totals can be misleading. However the number of stunners to break 0-0 ties and his football intelligence just has me saying he is the most effective player out there. Indeed Gerrard aside no one this year is close with The Drog injured and Lampard not as ever present as in previous years.

So I see United as well set. Ronaldo as real toughness in the good way - takes the hits gets up including that shocker by a Boro player last year. they have a strong squad in other areas and can probably survive and even play a better formation if one of the front 2 (WR & CT) gets injured.

Sun 13th Jan
John Terry : I Cheat So What?

Can you imagine the media scrum if Christiano Ronaldo said if someone puts out a leg I am going over it regardless? Not that some clown in a group will not fail to make the point he does and mutter the word cheat about the impossibly good and good looking young man who is maybe making me a believer this year....

You know what though if Ronaldo said that he would be talking about playing within the laws of the game.

Now take England captain and man's man the impossibly brave John Terry (JT). He admits to putting one on a striker early. Then today on Jokers on Sunday Rob and Chris talk about shirt pulling and blocking off and ask if this is a foreign player thing. JT goes no if the guy gets half a yard you give him a sly tug. Wor Chris and Rob know they won't stayed employed by Sky by showing a guest up but they could have asked if he considered breaking the rules, well you know, cheating.

It is this complete double standard that what continually scars the game and is outside the rules is done by defenders and is not called what it is - cheating. Yet someone plays within the rules and he is a cheat and somehow unmanly.

This is why in the spirit of the song by Stiff Little Fingers I call it "White Noise". Xenophobic nonsense to beat in the case of Ronaldo a potentially truly great footballer plying his trade in our league.

Sat 12th Jan
Marlon King 4 Million Turned Down! Anelka 15 Million?

You know football is a funny old game when a premiership side try to buy Marlon King for 4 million. I can only assume Boothroyd turned down Hodgson's kind offer as he assumed it was a radio hoax.

You can imagine Boothroyd laughing down the phone assuming he was speaking to a radio hoax “Fuck off Hodgson and take that furry animal off your bonce, and how about 10 million for Shittu!”. Imagine how stupid they feel now!!!!

I assume they are ringing back going of course you can have Marlon for 4 million…

Anyway Chelsea have committed 15 million and 4.5 years to Anelka so call that a conservative 30 million for a player they would not buy if it was not the African Cup Of Nations. A player who is now worth less than half that as like even Crespo they will have to subsidise his wages to leave. At best he is a marginal upgrade at reserve striker on Kalou and Sheva. Honestly with wages and fees can anyone believe that Sheva and Anelka will have cost Chelsea 90 million or so over 4 years. Sheva is almost a sunk cost as well. Anelka who is 29 in March will be this time next year. I know Abramovich is rich but the thick end of a 100 million not to give any young player a chance?

Sat 12th Jan
TWSI Sorry : Harbhajan Officially The Unluckiest Man In The World

Well it has been settled after a week of dignified silence and ringing endorsements to the character of Harbhajan Singh the great man of cricket has come forward and said it was all a misinterpretation. He was not calling Symonds a 'Big Monkey' but offering an insult about his mother so vile that no one will print it.

Indeed the man referred to as Bhajji by Indian supporters is twice so unlucky. He apparently called Symonds a Monkey in India meant as a god like figure apparently. Symonds quietly explained that it racially denigrated him in our western view. So would you believe it little Bhajji chooses to honour Symonds in a 3rd party language that Symonds amazingly does not understand. His words come out sounding close to 'Big Monkey'. How unlucky is that? Symonds not understanding Hindi (let us leave comments about his amazing lack of knowledge of Hindi out for now) and that Harbhajan's well chosen compliments to his mother sound like the insult he had previously mistakenly offered as a compliment to Symonds in India - before he realised he and half the crowd were inadvertently being racist.

So there we have it Harbhajan is not a vile racist just a very unlucky lad. Next time he might like to tell the match referee the truth rather than hiding behind lawyers but there is a lesson for us all there. India is shown as completely right, and TWSI completely wrong, to have suggested that this shining character of cricket who has drawn fulsome praise in his defense this week from hundreds of distinguished neutrals would soil cricket with a vile racist insult.

I am sure that now they are aware of it the BCCI will no longer allow those fine supporters who thought they were honouring Symonds as a god like figure to accidentally racially abuse him. TWSI withdraws any allegation that the BCCI should in any way have to answer a charge of endemic racism and childishness.

Fri 11th Jan
Kumble Finally Denies It

India were so confident that Harbhajan Singh could not be proved the vile little racist that they waited until nothing new could come out about the volatile spinner and now the captain says he did not say anything. Yeah Symonds and Ponting risked their careers in a Machiavellian plot - get real. The only defense is Symonds mis heard Singh. Given the silence from Kumble (a true gentleman compromised by a team mate) we can draw our own conclusions about whether the management and captain think what Harbhajan Singh is capable of. It has also emerged that rather than refute this Kumble tried to get Ponting to drop the matter such was his overwhelming confidence in Harbhajan Singh.

If it happened in the street then it is one person's word against another - It did not. In context it is also suggesting that Symonds and Ponting would risk their careers, reputations and have Machiavellian plotting to somehow stitch up a pretty ordinary test spinner taken overall. That they would have calculated the umpires did not hear Harbhajan Singh and there would be no film and lip readers. It was not like they reported it days or even minutes later - it was straight away. That is why the match referee would have trouble not taking it very seriously. I actually think in the context it is very hard for Proctor not to find against Harbhajan Singh.

The only defense from Harbhajan Singh is that they mis-heard. The lack of any defense of his character suggests either a) India lack a PR man - unlikely b) they prefer to use legal devices and try to claim legal levels of proof are required.

Quite where India supporters get the moral high ground from here when the team like a poker player bluffing on the river can only go all in is what disturbs me. They could and should have mounted a much better defence of Harbhajan Singh listing all his good works and his years of fighting racism, oppression and his good character unless of course those things were not available to them?

After all the man himself has not been too desperate to grab a microphone to deny he is a vile little racist. He has merely through the team and board denied saying that word at that time.

The shame for Harbhajan Singh if he is innocent is other than threatening damnation he has not been defended as a person. Again is India that sure of their man's humanity?

The fact remains the BCCI allowed this insult to be used and worse chanting throughout the last tour by Australia. They clearly view this as acceptable behaviour in private. Hence their defence has to been to try and equate alleged racism, which is acceptable to them, with not walking (which they don't do), breaches of etiquette and that Ricky Ponting is not a nice man. Many journalists at least have shown they are more anti Australian than anything and de facto supported the racism as somehow a legitimate sledge. They have ignored the context in which this happened for their own ends.

Thu 10th Jan
Allardyce : He Gone

Well they wasted weeks one hopes lining up someone else and drawing up a plan - I know I know successful chancers in business don't feel they need plans but don't understand you cannot do the equivalent of going public for money and then destroying the business to buy it back cheap later. Football clubs are every year or not at all and without a plan or strategy you just spend vast sums of money to drift up or down around a norm.

First up Allardyce has done a bang up job of taking a one size fits all and trying to apply it to Newcastle. He has stuffed the club full of 2nd tier players whose principal feature is their gap between self importance and achievement. A lot of back room people mean that Sam will have a lot of blokes to share his joy at a pay off with.

Why manage 5 years when you can get half the pay for 5 months.

The hard thing for Newcastle is where they go from here? Do they go down the route of buying more and more players? Can they really compete with Man United or even Spurs doing that? Do they go for someone who wants to build ground up and take 5 or 6 years needed to create the pipe line of cheaper players and saleable players to do that?

We all know the answer is that most likely they get another stop gap to buy and sell players with the elephant in the room being Alan "Dull" Shearer. A few wins and the fans will be sated as they were last year.

As unfair as it may sound unless someone new wins a lot of games this will be seen as more of a mark on Newcastle than Sam Allardyce. I bow to James Lawton who clearly could spot a pompous phoney like Allardyce better than I could. Allardyce given a cheque book loaded up with players who were clearly not motivatable. He even went for more of the same with the ageing under achiever Wes Brown who struggles to be motivated playing with Ronaldo, Rooney, Tevez, Giggs, Vidic, Carrick, Park, Hargreaves, Neville, Evra and co. Brown would have fit right in with Viduka, Owen and the cunt Barton.

Thu 10th Jan
Evolution Not Revolution For England

Bryan Ashton opted to stick with the world cup team by and large. Whilst one can say that is right and proper I tend to differ. My view is that England did well and made the best they could given their number 10 reeked. However outside the pack and scrum half we can hardly say any back was an unequivocal success.

It does not take many assumptions and much analysis to put England in perspective as well. Australia clearly could not cope up front with England and basically it was only the ease of their group win that had made them near favorites after some dire performances including nearly losing to Wales at home. France were the All Black beating aside a poor team.

Then it would take a brave man to say that England's strengths against South Africa were more clearly demonstrated in the final v South Africa than the 36 nil stuffing. The pressure of the final and being ahead all game probably keeping the 'Boks from truly cutting loose.

This may seem like revisionism but personally I was not impressed with England's wins over Samoa and Tonga and Australia and France's credentials were hardly overwhelming, much like England, in the year prior. Indeed despite being at home and motivated, one assumes, France took a stuffing in the 3rd place play off as well as losing to the Pumas in the opening game.

In 1990 the football world cup was pretty winnable with no outstanding team. England performed badly and well in different games and some glory was attained. As a marker to the future it was appalling.

Wed 9th Jan
Obi Mikel : Walking Red Card?

After dealing with a blocked toilet and even more effluence from down under the sending off of Mikel is meat and drink. I know people will claim that someone is trying to remove tackling from the game but what is the end result of an uncontrolled sliding lunging tackle? Very unlikely he is in any position to play the ball even if he wins it. The attendent risk of injury is far too high to justify allowing this. yellow cards stop nothing.

Some of the tackles people have been sent off for fall into the technically his studs are showing and he is sliding but he is in control and would not crack an egg - Robbie Keane the other week and Arteta's technically a high elbow hardly warranted 3 matches off. Mikel's was of the big man going right through you nowhere near the ball and was text book.... No complaints except of course this is football and everyone complains about everything and then wonders why no one takes them seriously.

I have some sympathy for Mikel who got a shocking red card in the Carling final last year when he was attacked. Indeed he was just about the only innocent person on the field that day. His ban upheld to prevent Arsenal bleating too much. Some wondered why the only 2 people to get off were the 2 yellow carded and worst offenders Fabregas and Lampard who did stand out from the crowd for a reason cough cough.

Mikel needs to learn how to tackle full stop.

Wed 9th Jan
Harbhajan Singh BCCI : No Apology No Care For The Game?

It is interesting that I have maybe in the rose tint of 2005 mistakenly viewed Australia as well behaved - although I consider using appealling and not walking to be fine. I don't see enough of them but do recall Warne bullying some decisions last winter. So I updated my What England need to learn from Australia! with a disclaimer.

What does get me is how many people pile in facts that have nothing to do with the major incident here - the racial abuse of Symonds. There is no moral equivalent in anything Australia have been accused of. Indeed the counter accusation against Hogg came after the test! Not as it happened.

The BCCI position if I can explain it without the contempt it deserves is that a) Harbhajan Singh did not call Symonds a monkey b) that you need a nuetral 3rd party to confirm he did - a laughable position among other ones they are peddling such as monkey is not insulting, that not walking is a moral equivalent, ignoring the suggestion this is not the first time Harbhajan has done this and ignoring that the Australian response was immediate and correctly done implying a strong case. Honestly is Ponting Machiavelli all of a sudden? He and Symonds risked far worse just to get Harbhajan Singh? Imagine if a third party heard what the little spinner said and contradicted them?

Yet not one word from someone accused of being a vile little racist. Not one word of I did not use any words and never would. It might be considered helpful if he made a statement. Yet what do we get from Harbhajan who has been accused of making multiple comments like this at other times? Nada Zip Nil.... His silence is not golden. At best it is allowing a festering sore to develop.

After the Indian public directed monkey chants at Symonds last year the BCCI did nada nil zip about those chants and signs. Which rather weakens anything they say now. They de facto support what is said? Is that too harsh? They claim to be at the forefront of the fight against racism when did this start last week?

So quite why BCCI are a) shocked at Harbhajan being found guilty b) Not condemning their fans who did chants and other low life behaviour (who continue to pummel message boards with vile racist abuse at Symonds and umpire Bucknor) c) are not condemning in the strongest possible terms and making clear they view Harbhajan's repeated behaviour and failure to apologise as making his 3 match ban trite as he will be left out for far far longer is beyond me. Nope not even an acceptance that it is insulting but that Harbhajan Singh did not use those words and he accepts that no one should. The principal of unimpeachable criminal level proof some demand is for the fairies.

The worst aspect is we see the fans following the team pathetically looking for moral equivalents. Thus Brad Hogg has been counter charged - a spinner for a spinner - a racist for a very rude man... Except he was cited tit for tat long after the game by the team manager i.e. unlike Symonds there was no immediate response and hence my contempt is earned.

Indeed the ICC seem intent on placating the BCCI through the use of patronising racism. Treating them as whining children who want what their younger/older brother got. Unfortunately as the Oval test showed appeasing whiner bullies does not work and just makes them demand more or continue to use the tactics of the 8 year old who owns the ball.

Thus the ICC placation methods have effectively ended or left a scar on the career of another great umpire, Steve Bucknor.

Saddest of all India are the first to bleat racism when they lose or are caught breaking the rules. They object to umpires and match officials all the time. Yet when it is their player or their crowd not only do they deny they also deny that even if what was alleged said was said it is racist. They seem intent on providing every bigot in Australia and the rest of world enough material to damn them - which is just sad.

In the end it is the ICC and the boards who have allowed cricket to be dragged through the mud for far too long. Our own ECB has and continues to show almost Harbhajanesque indulgence to Flintoff and Harmison. Indeed they were still far too influential on team selection after a year of public drunkenness and being mostly below form or unavailable. The ECB backed down in the face of Pakistan's boorish behaviour at the Oval. Worse the ICC allow anyone to do anything except in any way insult Robert Mugabe. Sledging has been allowed to become an issue as it has been unchecked - Collingwood and Prior combined for a hopefully low point against India last year. Drug cheats are free to play and not one comment from anyone on any TV broadcast shows how infantile and scared of debate world cricket is. The indulgence of cricket's top players is why the authorities should act.

The result of their failure to act at the Oval was: 2 Pakistan players bang to rights drug test failure: No excuses that would not be called racism if I made them: No Apologies: No ban. Does the ICC know what a mess their game is in? When racist abusers are victims and drug cheats free to cheat? When the abused are the problem?

Tue 8th Jan
Anelka Chelsea : Desperate Short Termism?

Anelka is 29 in March and Chelsea will pay what a minimum 12 million and 4 million a year for 3.5 years for him? That is commit 26 Million++ taxes fees and back-handers for a largely under achieving one dimensional goal scorer. To cover for 6 weeks at most or worse to alter your effective formation to carry afterwards. A slightly younger Shevchenko even - light weight goal scorer with no other intangibles or work rate.

They will turn down the chance to try any youth. All to cover 6 weeks of the African Cup of Nations. Chelsea is 15/2 to win the league. They have an ageing squad in terms of good players. They have millions committed to older players likely to decline like Drogba, Sheva and Balls. Not to mention they may end up committing to the soon to be 30 year old Lampard (In June 08). Does anyone sane want to be committing 40 million in 2 years time to Lamps, Drog, Sheva, Balls, Terry and Anelka (Ballack may mercifully be off the wage bill end of next year but the point is the same).

Whilst Mr Abramovich says he has plenty of money appropriated away why waste 25 odd million and the rest on such a player?

Anelka is at best a 2 goals in 5 player. Whilst he has height and pace he does not use them - prefers to poach on the fringes of games. We see the limited/non existent market for Jermain Defoe so why waste this money here? Berbatov with speed but without the class.

Chelsea at their best played off a single front player. You cannot do that with Anelka. Even at Bolton they play Kevin Davies wide to do the centre forward things at set pieces and get in when the boots are flying.

Surely Chelsea would get more long term benefit from letting Kalou either enhance his leaving value and develop as a forward player or even prove himself? If I was still a Chelsea fan I would rail at the sheer pointless waste of money. It is not like this turns 15/2 into 5s at best 13/2...

At its best this is a £25 million signing for at most 6 weeks and to provide cover after. At worst it will signal a return to 442 and wasting defensive cover for an ageing goal scorer who does not get enough goals to justify their playing for a contending side. Can you imagine 442 with Sheva and Nic... add in say 2 wingers in Joe Cole and SWP/Malouda then Lampard and it will be hard work for the other midfielder! Nutty.

I won't mention doubts about Anelka's failed impact at so many other clubs. His ability in the spotlight of higher profile clubs. The fact his type of player is increasingly shunned at top clubs - as his descent from Arsenal and Madrid to Bolton shows. However these things have not gone away either.

Tue 8th Jan
Harbhajan Singh : Are India Going To War Over This Clown?

Whilst Ponting's behaviour provided fuel for the fire equally the idea he and Symonds conspired to put away Harbhajan Singh is laughable. The idea that Harbhajan Singh would use a defamatory term is not.

Are India going to allow themselves to look like clowns taking their ball home on the small chance that there has been a miscarriage of justice here?

I mean if someone accused Sachin Tendulkar or Rahul Dravid then I would doubt it - especially as both would be man enough to admit wrong doing.

But Harbhjan Singh you're having a laugh? They don't even deny it they merely say there is no independent evidence. Pathetic.

All one can say is that before India paint themselves into a corner of childish self creation it would help everyone if Harbhajan just told the truth. It does not make anyone believe it any more when moronic counter accusations happen. That is more like confirming the accusations against yourself.

If we are to go down a route that says we need incontrovertible 3rd party proof of everything we may as well give up now.

Indeed all India are achieving is deflecting from the shoddy umpires and Ponting's degrading of himself and the game. The difference is that when Ponting has things pointed out to him he will likely sit in front of a microphone and apologise not insist his board and countrymen make total fools of themselves.

Mon 7th Jan
Rafa : No Direction But Home?

I have never been a paid up member of the Steven Gerrard fan club and only recently became a guest member, for now. Nonetheless for a player Benitez wants (or wanted) to be rid of for what I felt were good reasons Liverpool don't half miss Gerrard now. They seem to have become the misleading stereotype of the Houllier side as a one man team (there was a time when someone did the points per game and they were better off without Gerrard by a long way).

My problem with Gerrard has always been that in the third of games he is dominating fine. However in the others or against teams who press you for space he can become a liability (see 2004 v Portugal and his 38% pass completion). Indeed last year he got 5 goals and 2 assists in 35 premiership games which is dire for a player of a quarter of his talent.

After the 1st half in Istanbul Rafa and I must have wondered if he should ever play centrally again never mind in a 442. However 2 years of plodding nothing players like Sissoko, Alonso and Mascherano has convinced Rafa to try again and the results have been positive.

The problem is without Gerrard Liverpool is a mess. They have 3 strikers all tall and either shite or merely frustrating. You certainly don't feel that Torres is yet more than what he was in Spain - a 15 goal man for a mid table side (Anelka with a bit more youth). Kuyt is as poor a 10 million player, domestic transfers only, I have seen outside Rebrov (when 10 was worth 20 now) and loads of Chelsea players (Sheva, Sutton, Mutu, Paulo Ferreira, Tiago, Tore Andre Flo (Rangers paid 12!) etc...).

I defend rotation but I do not see any logic to Benitez version other than to keep his players fresh for a manager saving Champions League run. This is the moral hazard of managers putting their salvation over developing the team long term. I see no long term plan in buying near fully formed players without Man United's revenue - in the basket marked "Really Expensive" or "International But Nothing Player".

Given the owners have accused Benitez of being a pouter and they must read the press that tells them he is a clueless. Not to mention some rumblings from the players one wonders if this can go on. Whilst they can target the Champions League and appear better than they are there this team is not going forward. Gerrard is what 27 now? What is the plan in 2 years time?

Mon 7th Jan
Test Cricket Returns

It has been nice to see 2 mostly competitive test matches this week. Albeit rather spoiled by clownery from the umpires in Australia and worse the spoilt brat response to that not so much by Kumble but so called Indian supporters who racism may even exceed what Harbhajan is accused of.

The Australia India one was a real burner and would have been really interesting but for several appalling decisions. The clear middle stump LBW batter back on his stumps by Hussey when Australia had only a small lead would have made it very interesting - all the others did they nick it or not are hard calls.

India probably should tone down whinging at umpires - it happens. After all it was only last week Steve Waugh called for an end to exclusively nuetral umpires so they could use their boy Taufel. Taufel would certainly have made a difference in this test. However reading the bitterness and outright racism of the Indian supporters on the BBC you realise that maybe in a world of clowns (PCI, ICC) who banish umpires for calling it how they see it maybe they have to be nuetral. Some on the BBC excused their racism and Harbhajan's alleged racism as some sort of moral equivalentism with poor umpiring - morons.

Regardless of their luck though the sheer hunger to build pressure on the last day was shocking after 15 straight wins. I mean England sneaked a 2-1 win with victories by 2 runs and 3 wickets over Australia and went on an almost linear decline - the players wot won it tanking almost to a man bar Hoggie, Bell and KP.

Good to see the West Indies back albeit as in the early summer (winter to them no doubt) in England as soon as it gets hard they break. However that competitive edge may yet come back with experience they seem to be going a different direction to England.

Sun 6th Jan
FA Cup : No Magic For Managers

The shock of the 3rd round so far was not any team winning over teams in a higher league. It was that even lesser sides played lesser players. In beating Birmingham Huddesfield got goals from two players who as Andy Ritchie put it so nicely are not in the team at present.

The tournament has been won for the past 12 years by the top 4. They and the 5th and 6th best teams over all are contesting the last 4 of the Carling cup. The UEFA place invariably reverts to the 6th or 7th team in the league as the cup runners up are often another top 4 team (both cups) or at least a team in the top 7. Kevin Pullein, of the Racing Post, pointed out that so called shocks happen in their statistically expected numbers - even with lesser players playing.

Sure Everton will be disappointed as they tried to win albeit with 5 changes. Aston Villa frustrated United till the threat of a replay and tiredness from 4 games in the prior 14 days left the field open for Rooney (and others) to show given time and space they can cut even 2nd tier premiership teams managed by great motivators to shreds. United took no chances by using their best back 4 as well - got 70 minutes into Saha to boot.

Indeed the cups have become a microcosm of the disparity in the league with the top teams able to rotate 3 or 4 in and out and still keep on winning.

Ironically a smaller premiership and less games may benefit those below more. Without Champions League and internationals to strain them as much they may be able to field full teams.

Indeed the magic of the cup can best be described by the fans that attended at Blackburn and Bolton. Or indeed any number of other premiership grounds. Whereas the top teams will still fill their stadia with people unable to afford a premiership game or season ticket. Take Arsenal you can be just about the 55th thousandth person on the season ticket waiting list if you want! Even Chelsea got a virtual full house to watch the amateurs in the squad labour. 'Nough said.

It is still an opportunity for revenue and glory for players and fans of lesser clubs. However the magic of humbling super stars, rather than their boot cleaners, is less enticing.

Another soiling aspect of the cup is that TV so predicts and sends cameras in the hope of upsets that they can hardly qualify as such.

Then the disgusting tackles that lesser player perpetrate come into it. There was surely no magic in the bellicose bastard who manages Havant complain that only one Swansea player was sent off when his part time thug tried to end one of their player's career - the saddest part being the lunatic will get the same ban as the shirt tugger, real full out career enders should be 10 or more matches. Real cup magic is leg breaking tackles from plumbers?

We saw with Stevenage a few years ago that the bitter and twisted small timers who run these clubs use their day in the sun (metaphorically speaking) to behave like self important fools. They do this knowing the boorish media obsessed will back any small men over the big boys whatever the facts.

In a world of such media and information over load is there any magic in anything anymore?

Sun 6th Jan
Capello : Loads of Forwards No Front Man

Capello took in his first game since getting the England job with the excreable Villa United FA cup tie. I knew for the first time this year that my mate's boy Rooney had made an impact as I got a text from him. He always texts when his boy does something and this was the first time this season he had texted.

It is a measure of how poor Rooney has been relative to the Roonaldo tag and British Maradona that I get no comment back now and just a text every time he scuffs one in (when he middles them he generally would get 3 points in rugby and no goals in football as he showed today). Not even, it seems, United fans argue he is much above replacement value (a baseball term for a sub like a 4th outfielder on a contending team - see VORP Value Over RePlacement).

The problem for Capello is as he looks through tapes of Man United and England games that is not the player he will see. He will see mostly someone: Who is not a true front man: is awful played off a front man: does not try when played wide: Gives up and gets sent off (or tries to) when it does not go his way: Someone who does not score as many goals as could be reasonably expected in key games for England and Man United in international competition.

The other problem for Capello is that almost all the strikers at his disposal are similar. Better off the bench due to their lack of physicality and ability when pressed: Owen has lost his pace and cannot stay fit except when Madrid used him effectively off the bench: Defoe who just does not link with anyone and is even worse with the ball than Owen and Rooney: Rooney today showed that he can still look good in a opened game against tired opponents: Crouch may be best late on when the opposition sit back on a lead and you can try to ping them in off his immobile bonce.

There is a rub why was Rooney effective today? He was effective coming on against: a tired team coming off the Xmas madness: A team who had stopped hiding behind 2 banks of 4: He was given loads of space.

Rooney's one strength as he showed last year is that at his age he does not wear down. He finished last year relatively fresh and most of his big performances came after Xmas. Probably because he gets more space in those games as others tire.

With the lack of a real front man Rooney may be the best bet, that is not a ringing endorsement or a good thing, but if Capello wants to play someone bigger you'd be betting on Rooney being more successful in the future than the past if he was picked as a 2nd striker.

You do wonder if Lineker, Shearer and Hansen watch any other football the way they talk about Rooney as England's best player. Frankly all the indications are if United could buy another front man they would. Most journalists have settled down although no doubt 20 minutes against a Villa side who did not want a replay and had stopped putting everyone behind the ball will lead a blogger somewhere to see this as a launch pad - a mistake I have made 10 times in this kids short career - see me after the Roma game! An irony classic from me so wrong was it-

"Rooney is a top class player and he can play wider off a front man in a 4321 or up front for me. Better still in a fluid rotating bewildering attack like United visited on Roma. McClaren please note when the one dimensional Owen or Defoe are available."

As a comedy aside Rooney's hilarious self created moniker is the irony classic "The Big Man"... No doubt Jermain Defoe is the Great Man!

Sat 5th Jan
Wes Brown Bid : Newcastle Want To Be a Poorer Man's Chelsea?

I always grew up thinking it was in the nature of a mistake to correct itself. That you hit bottom and automatically rebounded. That people were rational and learned from their's and other mistakes. Not so Sam Allardyce it seems Newcastle were looking to get Wes Brown.

Regardless on one's view of Brown (useful squad player covers 2 positions well IMO) this is the kind of moronic signing that has got Big Sam into trouble. An ageing player (28) with a history of injuries and questionable attitude knowing his career is down hill if he leaves Man United. What will his motivation be with say 3 or 4 years and 2 million a year guaranteed? These kind of players often just go down hill for a couple of years before some rebound ala Butt. Phil Neville was an exception but then the Nevilles have exceptional personal qualities something I doubt, Brown's parents excepted, many would say about Wes.

Indeed even horizontal signings like Barton and Viduka have proved not enough. Before we mention the similar signing of Geremi.

On similar lines due to age I would question anyone other than Chelsea, who seem to want to waste money and have a coterie of expensive valueless older players in 2 years time, buying Anelka or Berbatov.

This is really moral hazard where desperate managers think only of the next season or sadder still half season when wasting their chairman's money. In baseball despite being unlikely to contend say Ed Wade ('stros) and Kenny Williams (White Sox) have traded the farm (youth prospects) when even a 500 record would be optimistic. This is the equivalent of buying players on the decline with little likely re-sale value beyond the next year.

Fri 4th Jan
England Cricket : No Idea? No Strategy? No Plan?

So Strauss has been brought back after a rest. That is clear then his excruciating batting over the last year had nothing to do with it. So obviously he will replace the most tired member of the squad so we can rotate - ta KP see you in May? Nope it is the clown's approach he replaces Bopara who can count himself dropped.

They have a plan though? Nope Bopara being replaced by Shah or Strauss is a change of direction. Do they feel after their years of looking at and considering Bopara that 3 tests when most of the team stank is a way forward? Of course they put Bopara in without a plan or having considered his development as part of a process. Do they put people in the team when they are considered ready? Or because they like them in the bar?

Given England's openers were not the weakness why have they brought Strauss back? To put KP 5th? Has Strauss been able to do anything in the meantime to prove himself back? Does Shah not now step up and we take Bopara as another foolish make it up as you go along howler acknowledgement by the selectors?

Matt Prince of Clowns is dropped as he cannot catch left armers - dropped 8 off Sidebottom. In the end he probably has a stronger case to replace Bopara as a batter than Strauss! Of course we assume that shows someone understands there is a long term and they realise he would not sustain his batting. He is likely replaced by another batter who wears gloves in the field.

In the end no individual change is that negative. Indeed I would not have started Bopara or even had him in the test squad at all. However it is clear that decisions and development are not part of a strategy and ethos to improve. Where honesty and not sparing people's feelings do not have the primary focus in selection. The problem for me is that Strauss was always going to come back and his dropping (and Bopara's promotion) come across as knee jerk.

Are we going to keep this make it up as we go along amateurism in all our sports? For all Clive Woodward's faults over 7 years of mostly blind alleys always had an ethos and did the analysis. That is why he is only the 2nd coach of a best England team in the world in a major sport in my lifetime - that probably flatters Ramsey's England but hey they were World champions.

Thu 3rd Jan
African Cup Of Nations

Each federation in FIFA has a perfect right to stage its tournaments when it wants. To have the African Cup of Nations every 2 years it has to avoid the World Cup. The objections to the African Cup of Nations which is more predictable in its timing than the phases of the moon are an example of crass knee jerk self interest from managers, chairpeople, fans and commentators.

Indeed the biggest impediment to a 2 yearly world cup is the 4 yearly snore fest that is the European Championships (honestly to be held in football hotbeds Switzerland and Austria this year). I know the last world cup turned into the battle of 451 keep ball catenaccio obsessed Euros but at least the early rounds saw some people who actually enjoyed playing football.

Quite why the Europeans insist on staging their tournament in the worst playing conditions (hottest) is beyond this humble scribe. Indeed they could stage one every 2 years were they as pragmatic on timing as the African federation. Oh, except who'd want to watch? Why the Euros stage it at all would be a great question when the way to win it is fitness, EPO and defensive resilience. As a kid did anyone dream of playing for 0-0 penalties and hoping for a set piece goal? Obviously all advocates of the European Championship did.

In the end regardless of all the whys and wherefores the ACoNs is the business of the African Federation.

Tue 1st Jan
English Cricket : Be Like Australia

The England cricket team and others often try to ape the mannerism and competitiveness of the Australians. However what they do often harks to an Australian past. They miss what makes Australia truly great and give the appearance not the actuality of Australia.

Indeed the use of Symonds at 6 show that they can learn from England. Indeed now England are so desperate for an all rounder at 6 and a batter wickie at 7 we played Bopara who is neither batter or bowler at 6 and Prior who is a poor keeper at 7. Whereas Australia passed on Moody and made Symonds improve for years before giving him a test place. Gilchrist may not have been the best ever glovesman early but was never Prior bad. The point being they are not dogmatic whereas England are and use cliche about character (sledging, shouting and arguing), all rounders and fighting spirit without regard for results.

Equally on sledging England are now among the low lifes of world cricket. At least the general complain that throwing sweets on the wicket went too far has seen Prior turn down the buffoon act (one hopes it is an act he can turn off).

What the Australians have that England, Pakistan and India truly lack is the following:-

• Differentiation between selection and captain, coach and players:

  Peter Moores the England coach has a large say in selection and so does Michael Vaughan. They work closely. Whereas say John Buchanen was more like an advisor/coach to the players. The captain is selected after the team.

  Indeed the assumption I make is that Australian players are made responsible for their own performance.

• Internal Argument

  Look at the way Buchanen and Ponting were sniped at by senior pros like Warne. In England you'd be considered a boat rocker. We constantly laugh at the Dutch football team - 3 players 4 opinions yet they must be the most consistent over achievers in world football!

  If you are relying on a limited mindset from above and expect conformity no wonder problems of mindset and seige mentality in the face of constructive critique allows these things to rumble on.

• Selection Based On Proof

  It has been hinted at above but it is rare for a very young unproven player to break the Australian test side. They first break the one day squad. They also have 25 contracted players not a narrow squad ala England - despite having less injuries and changes.

  Their selection is consistent not because that is an end in itself - in England that gives the likes of Craveney, Moores, Vaughan, Fletcher and Flintoff the excuse to stick with their narrow clique of mates. It is consistent because they pick the best players with a high degree of certainty and keep winning!

  Indeed can you imagine an Australian selector ever referring to a player by the nickname that implies he is a club wielding caveman? Yet Moores, Vaughan and Craveney call Flintoff "Freddie".

  Equally Australia would not have indulged the cuntery of Flintoff, Harmison, Prior, Collingwood and Fletcher for the last few years. They have at times behaved with a disgraceful self deceit that they are somehow entitled.

• Arrogance

  Warne accused Australia of this but for me arrogance is demanding high standards of yourself and expecting it of others. Pietersen is the most arrogant of the England players and the most successful over the last 2 years notwithstanding his poor showing in Sri Lanka.

  This is not the arrogance of entitlement of the hard drinking core of the England team.

• Behaviour

  Indeed once Steve Waugh had proven himself Taylor's successor he started to insist on better behaviour and wearing the cap. Setting standards that reflect their status.

  They understand play hard but fair the English are like savants trying to copy their masters without having the book that tells them why and how.

• Competition

  England players feel they can have tours off and just have to fit in to stay in the team. No Australian can expect to stay in the team without results and if they get dropped can expect years out of the reckoning. You prove yourself game after game.

At present I see no one who is looking in the mirror enough and in the right critical manner to challenge Australia home and away.

Tue 1st Jan
Berbatov : Avoid?

Ah the 70s where we would watch dreck on bad pitches for one moment of genius. Or the 80s where we would watch for a 40 yard ball by the Hod. Well now in the noughties we want to see our sides compete and give their all for the shirt. Berbatov was just born at the wrong time for English football.

Dimitar Berbatov would certainly attract me as a player for my club. He has more talent than any number of toilers. However talent is not achievement. Wayne Rooney is wasting himself as he won't look in the mirror and consider how he could be more effective. Berbatov is under achieving because for him it is all about him. Players like him are known as manager killers. Oh and he wears a headband.

Clearly an effective front man is top of Sir Alex's lists and as with Beckham at some point he must hate the high profile Rooney has as the kid is a sell if he were more worldly and attractive to continental football - sidebar why do English players advance so little and their ceiling crash so quickly? Rooney's problems listed Hansen style are: no height: wayward shooter: poor passer: can't hold the ball up: disappears out of games. His strengths: getting behind the last defender: occasional burst of brilliance: physicality, again in bursts.

So Berbatov looks attractive in a way. For me he falls down in many respects: he is 27 in January: Spurs paid 11 and will want 25+ surely or the risk reward is all wrong: he drifts out of not just a game but a whole string of games: at present he is a highlight's player: can he adjust to game in game out expectation at such an age?: can he play lone front man?

What Dimitar can do in cameo is not at issue it is more value for money and frequency. Indeed his age makes him more of a Chelsea style mistake but with Sheva a sunk cost whether they are in the market for the mercurial is open to question especially when they urgently require: a reserve centre half (Ben Haim is shite): 2 non injury prone competent full backs: another winger to replace Kalou/SWP and cover whilst Malouda's migraine wears off.

The killer argument for me when people wax lyrical about this supposedly 25 million pound player is this - has he improved Spurs? Are they better than when they were a good 5th season before last (damn near 4th which they were for 6 months of the season) with Mido (another complete fuck waster of talent) and Keane with occasional bits of Defoe? No, last year they were 5th but a gutless not trying all season late run 5th (hell Bolton were terrible 2nd half last year and got a UEFA place). Whilst one can argue about increased defensive frailty that can start with a forward not working or retaining possession or coming back at corners.

Jon's Dec 2007 Archive featuring
Barton Fink Sam Sack Chelsea Grant Prior Ashton Harmison Eboue Scum
English Cricket Follies Mitchell Report Mourinho Balked
FA Fools Mourinho Flawed Sky Rubbish CPS Laughable
No More Ashes Heroes

Jon's Nov 2007 Archive featuring
England's Poor Record in Big Games Manager Babylon Rafa Harmlessson
England Gone McClown's Last Foolery New Manager Hunt
Moores Flintoff Liverpool Chelsea Calzaghe
Book Attacks Catt Fletch Dallaglio FIFA Greed

Jon's Oct 2007 Archive featuring
Terracing Davydenko Spurs More Chelsea Rugby McClown's Losers
England RWC 3-0 3-0 3-0 3-0 Rafa Owen Celebrity Analysis
All Blacks Paul Robinson Walter Smith Terry Jol
Grant Chelsea Better England Better ODI Better
Fletcher Whistle Blowing Good

Jon's Sep 2007 Archive featuring
Not so Special twenty20 Wales Rugby
England Israel ODI Triumph Chelsea Hargreaves RWC

Jon's Aug 2007 Archive featuring
Mascherano ODI Ohuruogo Sotherton Jol Amir Chelsea Rooney
Bad Umpire Bad Coaches Bad Bad Keeper Terry Bad Contract
India Test England English Cricket Crony Clique Davydenko Bates United

Jon's Jul 2007 Archive featuring
Vaughan Tactics Tour Managers Open Choke
KP Jose 1st Test Scheduling
Trescothick Bates Tevez Arsenal Players
Torres Chelsea Money for Nothing Wimbledon West Ham Tresco

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